How to Get Unstuck in Midlife

Do you ever find yourself staring into space, coffee in hand, wondering is this it? If so, you’re not alone, and you’re definitely not broken.

Many women hit a moment (or several) in their 40s or 50s when life feels… well, stuck. The things that used to light you up now feel dull.

You’ve spent years caring for others, building a career, keeping the plates spinning, and suddenly you’re unsure who you are anymore, or if the hobbies you once enjoyed are still making you happy.

But here’s the good news: midlife doesn’t have to be a crisis. It can be your turning point.

Let’s talk about why and how to begin moving forward with small, meaningful shifts that fit into real life (no drastic overhauls required).

Why Midlife Feels Stuck and What’s Really Going On

Being “stuck” in midlife is rarely just one thing. It’s often a blend of:

• Hormonal shifts (hello perimenopause and menopause)

• Emotional fatigue from caregiving or career burnout

• Outgrowing old roles or patterns

• Losing connection with what brings you joy

• Wondering if it’s too late to make a change

  
  

But here’s the reframe: feeling stuck is often a sign you’re ready for growth. It means something deep inside you knows it’s time to realign with what matters most.

These simple actions are designed to create momentum, even if you only have 10 minutes a day.

1. Start the Morning With You (Before the World Gets a Say)

Let’s be honest, mornings can be chaotic. Alarm. News. Notifications. Family. Work. Pets. Before you know it, you’ve been awake for 45 minutes and haven’t had a single moment to yourself.

This is especially true in midlife, when you may be sandwiched between caring for teenagers, ageing parents, or juggling career transitions.

When you start your morning by tuning into everyone else’s needs, you disconnect from your own. And when that happens day after day, you slowly start to feel invisible, even to yourself. Not to mention that it’s exhausting!

What is taking priority over your waking time?

How you begin your day sets the tone for how you move through it. Even just 5 minutes of intentional “me-time” in the morning can:

• Regulate your nervous system

• Anchor your focus and emotions

• Strengthen your sense of self-worth and purpose

• Reduce the reactivity that often creeps in with stress or overwhelm

You don’t need an elaborate 2-hour routine. In fact, the simpler, the better. The goal is to connect to yourself before the outside world gets loud.

Try this:

Pick one of these morning anchors to try this week:

• One-Line Journal Prompt: Ask yourself: What do I need today? What would support me most right now? Write a single, honest sentence.

• 2 Minutes of Stillness: Sit with your tea or coffee. Breathe. No phone. No to-do list. Just you and a quiet moment to arrive.

• Set an Intention or Word for the Day: Choose one word that captures how you want to feel, e.g., grounded, kind, brave, or clear.

• Stretch: Before getting out of bed, take a long, full-body stretch. Acknowledge that you made it to this day.

  
  

You might think, “But my mornings are already full!” That’s okay. This is about starting small and making it sacred.

2. Move Your Body with Compassion (Not Obligation)

Movement in midlife shouldn’t be punishment, but rather a gift. Too often, we associate exercise with fixing, shrinking, or keeping up. But what if you moved your body simply because it feels good?

The goal isn’t intensity; it’s consistency with kindness.

Even 10 minutes of intentional movement can:

• Shift your mood

• Clear mental fog

• Release tension and stress

• Reconnect you to your body’s wisdom

  
  

When you move with compassion, your body becomes a partner, not a project.

Try This:

Put on a feel-good playlist and stretch or dance while the kettle boils. Do a few yoga poses before bed to unwind, especially restorative or yin yoga. Walk without a podcast and listen to the world around you.

Check out Yoga for Menopause Symptoms: Mindfulness & Self-Care Rituals for Your Best Self for more inspiration.

3. Name What’s Not Working

This is my favorite tip! One of the biggest reasons we stay stuck is that we’re moving through life on autopilot, reacting, coping, and surviving without taking a step back to reflect.

You might feel low on energy, irritable, or uninspired, but not quite know why. That vague, restless feeling can quietly chip away at your confidence.

The first step toward real, lasting change? Name what’s not working. Not to wallow in it, but to see it clearly. Because once you can name something, you can begin to shift it out of your life.

Write down all that no longer serves you and holds you back.

Midlife is a season of transition — physically, emotionally, mentally. The roles you've held for years may no longer fit. What once felt fulfilling may now feel draining. You may be carrying outdated habits, expectations, or even relationships that no longer serve who you're becoming.

But unless you pause and notice, you’ll stay tangled in patterns that keep you stuck.

Try This:

Each day for one week, reflect on two simple questions:

1. What drained my energy today?

2. What gave me energy today?

   
   

Write just one sentence for each. Over time, you’ll start to see patterns in people, tasks, environments, or even thoughts that either deplete you or support you.

4. Say No (Guilt-Free)

One of the biggest energy drains for women in midlife isn’t physical, it’s emotional overextension. You know how we say “yes” when we actually mean “no.” Volunteering when we’re already stretched thin. Taking on others’ stress, guilt, or drama because we’re the “reliable one”.

If this sounds familiar, you’re not alone. Many women have been conditioned to prioritize being liked, useful, or agreeable over being honest about their needs and limits.

But here’s the truth:

Every time you say yes to something that isn’t aligned, you’re saying no to yourself.

Midlife is the perfect time to flip that script. This season of life is asking you to stop leaking your energy and start protecting it with purpose.

At this stage of life, your energy is more precious than ever. You may be navigating perimenopause, caring for others, or shifting into new roles, and you simply don’t have the same bandwidth to say yes to everything.

“No” isn’t rude. “No” isn’t mean. “No” is a boundary. "No" is a complete sentence!

And you shouldn’t have to.

Try This:

If the word no feels uncomfortable, start with gentler scripts that still protect your time:

• “I’m not able to take that on right now, but I appreciate you asking.”

• “I need to prioritise rest this weekend, so I’ll have to pass this time.”

• “That doesn’t align with my current focus, but thank you for thinking of me.”

• “Let me get back to you” — this simple phrase buys you time to check in with yourself instead of saying yes out of reflex.

  
  

5. Revisit an Old Joy (And Reclaim a Piece of Yourself)

Remember the things you used to love doing — before the school runs, the work deadlines, the caregiving, the endless responsibilities? Painting. Playing the piano. Taking long, aimless walks.

If you feel stuck in midlife, part of the reason may be that you’ve lost connection with the playful, expressive, or creative side of yourself. The part that existed long before you became “mum,” “manager,” “partner,” or “helper.”

Midlife is often a time of transition and recalibration. You’re redefining what success looks like, what your values are, and who you want to be moving forward.

Revisiting something you once loved reconnects you with a previous version of yourself that helps you remember that you’re still a whole person, not just a list of responsibilities

Try This:

Write down all the hobbies or activities you used to love, no judgment or logic required. Choose ONE thing that feels the most exciting, nostalgic, or nourishing. Then block out one hour this week to do it.

Sometimes, this is the very thing that begins to shift the “stuckness” and bring you back to life.

6. Create a “Done” List (and Ditch the 20-Item To-Do List)

There’s a particular kind of overwhelm that comes from staring at a never-ending to-do list. And for many women in midlife, this list isn’t just about tasks, it’s about expectations, roles, and responsibilities stacked sky-high.

Instead of measuring your day by how much you did, start focusing on what really mattered.

A long to-do list can feel productive, but ticking off 20 small, low-priority tasks doesn’t necessarily move the needle. Worse, it can leave you exhausted and still feeling like you didn’t do enough.

Imagine starting each day by asking, “What is the ONE thing that will make me feel accomplished if I get it done today?”

That’s it. One clear, purposeful priority. This doesn’t mean you’ll ignore everything else — it means you’re not scattering your energy across 20 tiny things that aren’t aligned with your deeper goals or needs.

Try This:

Start with your “Big One”: choose the single most meaningful task that will bring progress, either personally or professionally. Add 2–3 supporting tasks maximum and keep it simple.

End your day with a “Done” list.

Instead of obsessing over what’s left, write down what you did finish. This rewires your brain for satisfaction instead of scarcity. Midlife isn’t about doing more, it’s about doing what matters most.

7. Unfollow to Focus

Social media can make us feel like we’re behind or not enough. Curate your feed to reflect who you want to be. Having a cull of your social accounts is equally as liberating as having a closet clear-out, enabling you to focus on quality input over quantity.

Cut down on the content you follow to keep your attention clear and focused.

Concentrate your time on the topics that add meaning to the person you are today, and who you want to grow into, with an emphasis on learning and development.

Try this:

Unfollow anyone who makes you feel less-than or isn’t really adding value to your life anymore. Try following no more than 10 accounts that inspire or calm you, or help you grow.

8. Practice Mindful Moments Throughout Your Day

You don’t need to meditate for 30 minutes, and let’s face it, who has the time or patience to do it anyway? Instead, just pause for 30-60 seconds. Feel your breath. Be here now.

Try these micro meditations as much as you can throughout your day, to return to your breath, your heartbeat, and your intentions and purpose for what you’re striving for.

Try this:

Whether you are waiting for your coffee machine or standing in a queue at the checkout, close your eyes (if it’s safe to do so) and simply notice the sensations in your body. Breathe slowly. Let that be enough.

9. Start a “What If…” List

Give your dreams space to exist, without needing to act yet. This is a great exercise when you have some quiet time for contemplation and reflection.

When you have figured out what’s on your heart, you can start taking action to move towards it. And that might be a process of delegating existing responsibilities to someone else, to free you up to do what you need to do to follow your calling.

I often do a similar process at the end of each year and then review where I’m at every month to ensure I’m on course to reach my “what if”.

Try this: 

Write down five “What if…” statements, for example, “What if I started painting again?”, or “What if I changed careers or did a night course?”. 

If you designed your ideal day, what would you be doing, and with whom?

10. Ask: Who Am I Becoming?

You are not who you were, and you’ll never be the old you again, as you keep on growing and changing. Not only is it okay, but it’s also liberating.

Midlife is a stepping stone to your next evolution, and so far in my story, I can confirm I am now in my biggest transformation. It might have taken me many decades, but I finally enjoy being myself, and I am not afraid if others don’t like me for who I am.

When you live in your truth, you attract like-minded friends.

While “authentic” seems an overutilized word these days, it also means to be truthful to yourself. And if you and I aren’t authentic, it feels like something is out of alignment in our psyche.

Try this: 

Journal or voice note on the question, “What kind of woman am I becoming?” Alternatively, ask yourself how you really want to be spending your time, and what you can let go of to create more space for the things you love. Let your answers guide your next steps.

🌼Final Thoughts

You don’t need to have it all figured out

Sometimes, the best first step is just acknowledging that you want more: more peace, more connection, more you and the things you love.

Midlife isn’t the end of the story. It’s the middle, where your character grows wiser, stronger, and more grounded in who she is.

You’re not stuck; you’re on the edge of something powerful. And you just need to make the first move towards the life that aligns with the person you’ve grown to be.

Good luck with your transformative journey into becoming the real you, who knows her values, is confident in her strengths, and stands up for the values she lives by!